Survive
by SnickyPop
Summary: The night after the massacre, Sasuke hears an interesting conversation that will flip his life upside down. The results of Sasuke growing up with the truth? manga spoilers, 400 ish. no pairings.
1. Chapter 1

**WARNING: spoilers. 400-ish. **

_--_

'_We've all been sorry,_

_We've all been hurt._

_But how we survive,_

_Is what makes us who we are.'_

—Survive, Rise Against

_--_

Uchiha Sasuke blearily opened his eyes.

_Where am I?_

He was in a small cot that smelled of detergent. The room was dimly lit, but his nose twitched with the sterile smell and he could make out the vaguely white walls.

…_hospital? Why…?_

Memories accompanied by extreme anger came crashing down on him like a tidal wave.

_killkillkillgottagetstrongKILL—_

But why--?

_Mom._

A memory of his mother lying on the floor—dead.

_Dad. _

The once proud man, strewn over his wife.

_I wasn't strong enough…_

Sasuke wearily slid out of the hospital bed and pushed back the curtain. As he made his way through the halls he heard two nurses talking.

"Yes, he was the only one to be spared. To think that the illustrious Uchiha Clan has fallen…"

Sasuke slowly padded away.

So it wasn't a dream.

Sasuke felt the pressure of tears building in the back of his eyes, but found he could not cry. He was numb. He heard more whispers,

_...gone…_

…_all dead._

…_last one…_

He couldn't take it. The young boy quickly dashed through the halls. He passed the cafeteria in a dash, avoiding doctors and nurses desperately. His feet were clomping up stairs and his hands were pushing on a door, and soon his eyes were blinking away the blinding white light of the moon.

It was smaller than it was _then_. It had been a few nights since _that_ night.

Those memories seemed to become sharper, more intense, under the light of the moon. He had to get away; he had to—!

There! The young Uchiha scrambled into a metal box just big enough for him. He curled into a tight ball against the farthest wall, trying to shrink away from the glowing light of the moon.

It was quiet for a moment. He could hear the chirping cicadas and the whistling of the cool summer wind blowing through the trees. The cold metal he was sitting on felt reassuring, this little spot of his was safe. It was his and his alone.

The natural sounds were interrupted by the low murmur of voices. Sasuke's anger flared. Someone was intruding on his box—his spot. With a scowl the young boy crawled backwards, trying to get closer to the owner of the voice so he could tell them to go away. He paused when he thought he was close enough to the voice. When he could actually hear part of their conversation.

An old man was speaking. His tone was regretful. "…still think we could have resolved this with diplomacy. To have a child kill his family…"

Sasuke's heart skipped a beat. He held perfectly still. The voices seemed to drift towards him like in a bad dream.

The next voice was rough, gruff, most definitely old. "Don't fool yourself. That clan was asking for it, trying to take over the village. Nothing will happen to the leaf as long as I am head of ANBU."

The next voice was an old woman's. "Your worries will not be over until every Uchiha is dead. Including that brat." Sasuke's breath hitched. They wanted him…dead?

"Koharu!" It was the first old man's voice, regret replaced with a fierce sharpness. "How can you even think of such things? Itachi chose to spare his younger brother; can you not give him one thing in exchange for sacrificing so much for his village?"

…_he…what? _

A new voice was speaking, another old man. "Feelings aside, if we so much as attempt anything on the boy, we can say goodbye to this peaceful era. You know that boy will keep good on his promises."

_What promises?_

The woman was speaking again. "We can take a war. Konoha is strong."

The rough, bitter voice whispered out just barely loud enough for Sasuke to hear. "So soon after the war? The battle against Kyuubi? And now losing an undeniably powerful clan, I do not think we could bear it. Our ninja forces are already low. We would be seen as a joke. We might be able to go to war in a few years, but now is not the time."

The sharp voice was back. "Would you really risk war on one boy?"

It was quiet for a moment.

"Itachi will die one day." Spoke the third old man's voice.

The woman clucked her tongue. "Did he not want his little brother to be the one to kill him?"

The sharp voice turned back to regretful and sighed. "And for Sasuke to not know a thing. I do not know his motives, but he wanted Sasuke to live probably the biggest lie in the history of Konoha. He will grow up an avenger. He will undoubtedly leave the village in search of his brother one day."

The woman scoffed. "Good riddance. That boy will bring nothing but trouble..."

He didn't want to hear any more. With shallow breaths, Sasuke slowly backed away from the voices. He was soon back into the bigger hollow of his cool box. It was chillier than it was before. The cicadas suddenly sounded menacing; the wind was like a thousand hidden enemies.

Who were those people? Why did they order Itachi to—

His heard clenched. His brother…his brother wanted him to _hate_ him? He easily could, and Itachi probably understood that. He had planned on it. He wanted Sasuke to kill him.

But why?

Maybe he was ordered to do that too. By those people who wanted Sasuke dead, but couldn't kill him because Itachi wouldn't allow it.

After doing so much to him…his brother still wouldn't let anyone hurt him.

_No…,_ Sasuke thought,_ that's a lie. _His hand ghosted up to the bandages on his left shoulder, where under lay a scar from Itachi's shuriken.

_Why_ did he have to follow orders?! Who orders to kill of their own, anyway? What had his clan done to deserve this? Why had Itachi let him live? Didn't he know that he would be so, so alone?

He missed his family. He missed his brother. He missed feeling _safe_.

That night, as Sasuke crawled back into his hospital bed, he felt like the weakest, most pitiful thing on the face of the Earth.

He decided he didn't like that feeling.

_--_

For once and for all:

I do not own Naruto or Survive by Rise Against.

Author's Note:

I've wanted to do a story centered on these two for awhile now. I've tried a few, but this is the first to actually make me desperately want to post it. (Others have come close, but plot ran away from me.)

So basically, instead of Sasuke running to his house, he ran to the roof, into an air vent, and eavesdropped onto a conversation that will change his life as we know it…

Feedback?

SnickyPop


	2. Chapter 2

_--_

Sasuke awoke the next day to the face of an old man. He wore robes of white and red, and an unlit pipe was in his mouth. This was the Hokage.

The man laughed at Sasuke's vaguely puzzled expression. "Relax, young one. You are not in trouble. I have just come to straighten out a few things concerning the recent…event."

The ache in his heart that had been dulled by sleep returned full force. As did the memories of last night. Those voices…the ones voicing the truth that had been hidden away from him. He was sure this voice had been apart of it. But which part, he couldn't remember. Last night was a haze of emotions that was still too fresh to pick apart yet. But could it really be the Hokage—trusted and caring, old man Hokage? Could it really be…?

"Sasuke-san?"

Sasuke snapped his head back up, eyes accusing. There was no doubt in his mind; this man was one of the ones who ordered his brother to kill his family.

"Are you alright, Sasuke-san?"

"Wha…oh. Yeah. Fine." He turned his eyes downward, trying to curb to urge to attack the man. "What did you want…Hokage-sama?" he added the respectful title with a wince. How could he respect a man who had done so much to him?

Sandaime eyed him but continued on. "Yes… We have confirmed the killer of your clan."

_Of course_, Sasuke thought wryly_, of course you would know who did it. __You__ chose him!_ "I already know who it is," he replied dully.

Sandaime nodded solemnly. "Yes, I suspected you did." Sasuke gave no response but looking out the window idly. It was bright out. A hot summer's day, no doubt.

"Sasuke-san, with the recent death of your family, the Uchiha Estate now belongs to you. We—"

"I don't want to live there," he interrupted. And he didn't. Even if his brother was ordered to do what he did, that did not change the fact that he did it. It was still a place of death. He did not want to stay there. "I'll find some place else." Sasuke flicked his gaze back to the old man's face, challenging.

Sarutobi looked slightly taken aback by his straightforwardness, but nodded nonetheless. "Whatever makes you most comfortable. I can arrange for an apartment…somewhere close to the Academy, if you wish."

Sasuke nodded and thanked him, turned his head to face the window once more. He didn't want to look at this man anymore. "Excuse me," he slid out of bed, "I want to take a shower. Are we done?" he looked imploringly at the leader of his village.

Sarutobi nodded with a sigh, getting up slowly. "Yes, I suppose we are." He looked a moment longer at Sasuke's pale face; dark circles clear under the boy's eyes. "But if you ever need anything just come to the Hokage's office, okay?" Sasuke nodded lightly and closed the door to the restroom.

He didn't like that old man.

­_--_

Sarutobi sighed and slowly made his way out of the hospital. Uchiha Sasuke would be a troublesome boy; he could tell already. Dangerous, too. The boy obviously held some sort of disdain toward the elderly Hokage, but he kept silent, only sending hidden glares his way. Just like a true ninja, the boy already knew that the silent attacks were the most lethal.

Sandaime scoffed and pulled away from those thoughts. He was starting to think like his advisors, like his ANBU commander. Really; suspecting a child of wanting to attack him…

On his way into the business district he noticed a yellow blur coming at him fast. Thinking quick, Sarutobi held out an arm and caught the blur, which turned out to be a young boy with bright blonde hair.

Then again, with children like this boy around, he wasn't that far off from being assaulted by children.

Naruto grinned up to him. "Sorry, old man. Wasn't lookin' where I was goin'!"

The Hokage just smiled and patted him on his head affectionately. "Just pay more attention next time, Naruto. We wouldn't want anyone getting hurt."

The boy let out a foxy grin. "Sure, sure. Are you sure I didn't hurt your frail old bones though, old man? Maybe you shouldn't go outside so much…"

Naruto earned a playful whack over the head. "Easy there, Naruto. I may look old, but I am the strongest ninja in this village! Watch your mouth."

"Yeah, well, I'm gonna replace you some day, old man!"

Sarutobi looked surprised. "Oh, really now? Since when have you wanted to become Hokage?"

"Since, like, _ever_." He explained childishly.

Sandaime shook his head. This boy changed dreams so fast… But he couldn't help the smile that arose on his lips. "That's a good dream, Naruto," he said patting the boy's head. "But a hard one to obtain. You'll have to work really hard to get there, you know."

Naruto stuck out his tongue. "Yeah, yeah, I know. But I'm going to get there and become the most respected ninja in the village!" The boy turned around and started to dash off, throwing over his shoulder, "Gotta go tell old man Ichiraku and Ayame-nee-chan. Bye, old man!"

Sarutobi smiled. This boy was on track. Maybe young Sasuke could find a friend in him…

_--_

Sasuke stared at the oppressive, wooden door before him. On the cheep green paint, two neat, silver letters were placed.

_36._

His new apartment for who knew how long.

Sasuke's stare turned to a glare. He had finally been omitted from the hospital after a thousand mental exams (he was _not_ insane!) and had found a note was left in his room with an address on it.

There was no key.

And no, he already tried. The door was locked.

So he stared. Maybe if he did it long enough…

_Three minutes later…_

Nope. Still locked.

With a grumble, the frustrated Uchiha shuffled his feet and kicked over a bucket, the mop tumbling neatly after.

He had to hit his head against the wall when he saw what fell out of the bucket. Sitting there, glinting in the afternoon light.

Stupid Hokages and their stupid keys.

Sasuke picked up the small object and stuck it in the door. He smirked when he heard the tumblers unlocking. Take that, you stupid door.

The apartment was small. It had one bedroom, a kitchenette attached to a living room, and a restroom. He was glad for the spacious closet next to his bedroom door, though. When he started collecting more and more weapons, the storage would be needed…

But it was bare. It was cold.

_It's not home_, a small voice reminded him.

But he didn't want his home. Not anymore. He didn't want the ghostly streets, the empty shops, his mother's deserted kitchen, or the bloodstained walls. The echoing screams…

Sasuke looked around once more. The apartment suddenly seemed much more inviting.

One problem.

He didn't have any of his stuff.

_--_

Later that night, when the stars were shining above and the moon was well into the sky, Sasuke's little apartment was dark. There were a few boxes of his old things in the living room, strewn across the sparse furniture. In his room, an exhausted Sasuke slept soundly in his bed, snuggled deep under a much too large indigo blanket with the initials _U.I. _sewn conspicuously to the corner.

_--_

He tried to ignore the whispers, but they seemed to follow him wherever he went. The street in front of his apartment, the road to the Academy, the schoolyard, and now even during class. Sasuke was thankful for the recess bell. He could get away from everyone—from the whispers. He didn't like the stares on his back.

So he hurried out the door and ran around a few corners. He didn't want to have to answer the questions ("Where were you?" – "You look different." – "Is everything alright?" – "I went by your house; no one was home."). He didn't need help. He needed training. And though he hated to admit it, he was incredibly weak.

A light grin escaped his lips as he reached his secluded, empty destination: the weapon targets.

_--_

Sasuke returned to the classroom in a considerably better mood. Practice that day had goon pretty good; he hadn't gotten too rusty in his…absence. So with higher spirits than before, Sasuke sat down in his seat to listen to Iruka-sensei's lecture on the ranks of ninja.

He couldn't help but twitch when ANBU came up.

"…usually skilled in two or three chakra types, Taijutsu, Ninjutsu, and Genjutsu individually, perfect aim with weapons, tracking jutsu, summons, torture and interrogation, assassination, and the list goes on! ANBU truly are the jewels of our village." Iruka finished admiringly. Sasuke quietly scoffed. They were also the Hokage's dogs… Speaking of which…

"And next is Hokage, right, Iruka-sensei? Right?" called an excited voice from the back.

The chuunin sensei hummed. "Someone's excited, aren't we, Naruto?" The man was obviously amused.

Exuberance was rolling from the back of the room in tidal waves. "You bet, Iruka-sensei! That's because I'm going to be Hokage some day, believe it!"

Sasuke scoffed. "Fool…" he muttered lowly. It was bad to be a dog of the Hokage, but even worse to be the fool giving the orders.

But Naruto had obviously heard his statement and lashed back. "Bastard! I'm gonna become Hokage and sentence your ass to prison! That'll teach you to call me a fool!"

Sasuke rolled his eyes heavily and rested his jaw on his fist while Iruka chastised the boy for using bad language. He had just closed his eyes when he heard a voice round on him.

"And Sasuke-san, it is not polite for you to put down others dreams." –a stern glare to both of them— "I want both of you to apologize for being so rude."

Sasuke glanced back to Naruto lazily. It was the first time he ever really looked at the boy—tan skin, blonde hair, whisker-things on his cheeks. He was unique for where they lived.

Sasuke didn't care. He just crossed his arms and sent back the boy's blue-eyed glare. "I'm not going to apologize. This idiot shouldn't become Hokage." Sneaking, fake, conniving Hokages…this kid was an idiot to want to be one. One of those fake Hokage's who was always smiling and laughing one minute, the next, sending troops out to die.

But Naruto obviously took his proclamation in a different manner. "I am _not_ an idiot, bastard! I _will_ become Hokage, just you watch!"

A vein of anger popped out on Iruka's forehead. His face turned red as he yelled, "That's it! I will not have this in my classroom! Both of you get out!" His finger pointed to the door. He supposed that was all the teacher could do, considering he couldn't really call their parents…

Sasuke sent a light glare Naruto's way and left the room swiftly, hands shoved in his pocket. The blonde closed the door behind him and leaned against the wall, a sour expression pinned to his face.

Sasuke kept walking.

"Where do you think you're going?" Naruto called after him gruffly.

Sasuke didn't pause. "Away. I could learn more on my own than at this place."

Naruto glared. "Oi! Iruka-sensei is great, and what are you going to do? Teach yourself?"

Sasuke halted for a moment to glare back. "Ever heard of a scroll, idiot?"

"Hey—!"

Sasuke turned the corner before Naruto could finish his sentence.

The blonde boy narrowed his eyes. There was something wrong with that guy ever since he came back. Glaring at nothing, acting out, and now even ditching. Naruto sent a sidelong glance at the door where Iruka's voice could be heard seeping out. A mischievous grin spread across his face; he wouldn't be missed.

Maybe he would be able to see what was up with that bastard…

_--_

Naruto narrowed his eyes in confusion as he followed his dark-haired classmate. He had never been down this path before, and that was saying something. He thought he knew most of the streets in the village after living there for so many years.

They were nearing the farthest corners of town and the walls of the village. Sasuke couldn't seriously be thinking of _leaving_ the village, could he? He only called him a bastard, nothing special.

Naruto was seriously considering jumping out from his hiding spot and apologizing for real to the boy. If it would keep him in the village…

But the dark-eyed boy stopped in front of a walled gate surrounding a compound of houses. He pushed open the gates and slid past the caution tape, entering quietly. Naruto blinked. Why in the depths of _hell_ was Sasuke sneaking into this weird place?

Naruto waited a moment before following Sasuke in, just to be sure.

The place was deserted. Almost scarily so. His blue eyes widened when he noticed dark brown spots scarring the walls of houses. Naruto froze for a moment. Maybe he should just let the boy alone…

In the end, curiosity won over his fear, and the boy continued down the streets, following Sasuke's footprints in the dirt. They lead straight to the end of the street, to the biggest house of them all. Naruto hid in the bushes by a pond with colorful koi in the murky pool. Sasuke padded quietly down the outside halls till he reached a door. Hesitating for but a moment, he reached out and opened it, sliding in carefully.

Naruto stayed crouching for at least five minutes before Sasuke resurfaced from the room, sliding the door shut. Naruto's eyes widened. So _that_ was where he would get the scrolls. He had at least four in his arms, all pretty thick. He was really serious.

Curiosity still not sated, Naruto followed Sasuke to a clearing where the stalked boy just sat down and started reading a tree. From the way his muscles kept on flexing, Naruto could tell it was a Taijutsu scroll. If it were Ninjutsu or Genjutsu, he would be practicing hand seals or something.

When Sasuke was halfway through the exercises, Naruto left.

Deep down, he knew he was jealous. Sasuke's footwork was amazing, and he was picking up on those kicks and punches so fast…it wasn't fair. Naruto had to work hard just to get the simplest henge to work…but this guy was just insane.

…and he was probably closer to becoming Hokage than Naruto was at the moment.

The boy scowled. He would find some scrolls like that and become even better at fighting than Sasuke! He _would_ be Hokage.

_Believe. It. _

_--_

Author's Note:

Sorry this kinda took awhile...I wanted to add a bit more to it, but promotion and family vacations snuck up on me. Originally, there were a few more pages of stuff to this, but if I had kept those, it would have completely dropped off on nothing. So this is what you get :D

I hope this will suffice for one month while I am across the Atlantic in (many) places where I cannot access internet,

Snicky


End file.
